I thought that as I got older I would cry less. I thought wrong. I’m such a sap.
On Thursday April 4th, 2013, 25 new volunteers took an oath and swore in as Peace Corps volunteers in the incredible country of Ecuador. The ceremony was lovely and the speeches were inspiring. Our training manager is a really wonderful person and an eloquent speaker so I definitely choked up during her speech as she gave us advice and commended our hard work thus far. Then our country director and the US Ambassador, David Namm spoke. Finally, each program had a volunteer say a few words. First was Natural Resource Conservation representative, Devin, who ended his speech by saying “if there’s one thing that I want you to remember and take away from this, it’s that… Chelsea is taken!” which was a result of a long-running joke that Devin is going to marry me because I bake good desserts. Sigh. That part didn’t make me cry, just made my face turn really red. Then my program, Teaching English as a Foreign Language, had representative speaker, Meaghan speak, in which she quoted Charlie Chaplin as saying “We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other´s happiness — not by each other's misery.” and yeah, I boohoo-ed.
Then on Friday, we said goodbye. To the amazing staff. To the beautiful training center. To speaking in hypotheticals about our potential future. To our easy days of studying and playing. And to each other. And like a baby, I cried again.
Finally, on Saturday, I packed up all my things and left the only home and the only family I know in Ecuador. This time, waterworks. So much so that the taxi driver handed me a tissue and asked me what was wrong and where was I going. Through sniffles and sobs I told him my new town and I’m sure he thought I was as crazy as the telenovela stars since my town is only a few hours away, but it would have been impossible to explain what I was leaving. My host family took me in at a time when I was the most vulnerable I’ve ever been after the biggest change I’ve ever made and they truly made me feel like part of their family. In less than 3 months! I will never be able to repay them for their kindness.
I’m crying as I write this.
It’s not necessarily that I’m that sad or that I don’t like change. I wouldn’t be here if that was the case. I cry for catharsis. If I feel too much of any emotion, be it happy, sad, angry, I feel better after shedding a few tears. As if the overwhelming part has left with them.
So now I’m in my new room in my new house (and I’ve dried up the tears, don’t worry) and I’m very happy so far. When I visited about a month ago, my house hadn’t been approved yet and everything was thrown together very last minute so at that time, I didn’t have a shower head or a closet and I was a bit worried about everything being ready. I was also pretty emotional during the visit (surprise surprise) and not thinking as positively as I should have been, but now I see all the potential for a very happy life here. My walls are green and my curtains are yellow. I have 2 big armoires, a TV, and my own bathroom with hot water so I guess you could say that I’m living the Posh Corps life. My new host family also has 3 members. My host grandmother’s name is Maria, she has lived in Pujili her whole life and is a very nice lady. My host mother is Consuelo, (but she likes to be called Consuelito, everyone adds the diminutive to everything here, adding –ito means “little”) she is an English teacher at a high school in the nearby city of Latacunga (but she doesn’t speak English with me so I can improve my Spanish). And my host brother is Esteban, he’s 11 years-old and seems like a really good kid. He’s very polite and asks really intelligent questions about the US. My host grandmother has chickens in the back and grows some vegetables so I’m thinking about asking her if there is space for me to grow some of my own. We had a nice dinner tonight, the dogs haven’t really been barking at me, and I took a hot shower until I was pruny. Life definitely does not suck.
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